Time to get the hell out of dodge.
I would argue that few people, if any know that this is the 3rd incarnation of my blog. Most recently is what you know, an obscure song lyric-titled blog but the previous versions were as follows:
Version II: Toolbox House blog. The vision for this blog was for us to have a place for the 9 of us in 2008 to privately post prayer requests.
--Womp womp…failure.
Version I: A completely private and self-indulgent blog that was created to voice hidden insecurities and in the end was deleted leaving the URL http://jmmysheep.blogspot.com vacant.
--The only redeeming part of this was the title line of the first post. “It’s time to get the hell out of dodge”
About once a year this sentiment works itself into the forefront of my mind. It becomes such a constant thought that it robs me of the joy that the Lord has given me by planting me here and makes me only long for a future I don’t have yet.
There are certain questions I’ve been thinking about recently. There are certain questions that if Jesus were to ask of me I think that I too like the rich, young ruler in Matthew 19:16-30 would walk away sad, knowing how much his request is going to cost.
The question for me has been this: “Jeremy, I want you to stay; at least for now. Will you stay in Harrisonburg and be faithful with the mission I’ve put under your feet here in the valley?”
Every human being you’ve ever met shares one thing(many but in the current endeavor we’ll focus on just one)…We all want to be part of something BIG! We want to MATTER! We want to be remembered!
I’ve been thinking about what it must’ve been like to be one of the 12. How amazing would it be to have first hand experience with Jesus’ teaching, molding and sharpening? Can you imagine not only being one of the 12 but being in Jesus’ inner circle of 3? John, James(Jesus gave them the nickname “The Sons of Thunder”…awesome) and Peter got to spend unreal time with Jesus and witness crazy stuff like the raising of Jairus’s daughter along with seeing the Transfiguration and being with Jesus in the hardest moment of his life, the garden of Gethsemane. All of these guys are being honed for something HUGE. Jesus is preparing to change the world through these guys.
Jesus is arrested and tried and eventually nailed to a cross and as Jesus is on the cross what does he say to John?
“26When Jesus saw his mother there, and the disciple whom he loved standing nearby, he said to his mother, "Dear woman, here is your son," 27and to the disciple, "Here is your mother." From that time on, this disciple took her into his home.” –John 19:26-27
“John, I want you to stay. Take care of my Mom. You are going to be a pillar of this community and of MY Church. Will you be faithful with all that I have given you?”
Three days after this Jesus is resurrected and begins to go around showing up here and there telling people that he has conquered death and eventually meets up with his disciples and says this:
"All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in[a] the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."
This guy Paul eventually shows up and meets Jesus and Jesus tells him that he is going to be the missionary to the Gentiles(anybody who wasn’t Jewish).
Ok, let’s recap:
Paul and the other disciples calling: Go to the every nation of the Earth telling them about what you’ve seen and experienced. Baptize, grow and encourage them.
John’s calling: Stay. Take care of Mary. Build the Church.
Paul: Go. Travel, be awesome and be known all around the world.
John: Stay. Mom likes flowers and needs the yards mowed on Thursdays.
I would argue that EVERYONE wants Paul’s calling, at least a little bit of it…okay everything in Paul’s calling minus the snakebite, ship wrecks and stoning(with rocks...). No one wants John’s calling…except John.
John’s relationship with Christ was so personal, so intimate that years later as he recounts his relationship with Jesus he is refers to himself as “The disciple whom Jesus Loved.”
I think one of the most amazing things about John is his understanding of God and His sovereignty, God is the true vine and is holding the world together.
…but what if that’s what Jesus is asking of some of us?
When I graduated HS I wanted nothing more than to get the F out of Harrisonburg. I applied for apprenticeships in Minnesota, Colorado, Washington State and Georgia to build guitars but Jesus said I was to stay here. I applied to go to The University of Texas, Texas A&M and Texas Christian University…Jesus told me to stay. I took an interview with a church in Arlington, Texas to help out with the youth…Jesus once again told me to stay.
I’ve been leading Young Life in Shenandoah County since March of 2006. I’ve seen the Lord do amazing things, I’ve seen him reconcile entire families to himself and each other. How could I ever doubt the calling that Jesus has for me.
I believe I have finally arrived(or even come close to) at a place where I can now see how God loves me and wants me here. I’m finally learning to let God love me and for him to be enough.
I pray that we would be faithful in our callings; that we would be courageous and bold enough to walk in what the world called the “safe” option.
2 comments:
I am going to make 2 references as to why your decision seems correct and wise.
First, we'll look at Socrates. He was a philosopher yes, but possibly more importantly, he was an Athenian. We humans are political animals, we need a city. Everyone today is running from one end of the globe to the other. What do they gain? It's a matter of rootedness and of connection to people. While we think the internet and cell-pone are great our body can only be in one place at a time and our social interactions are best made through our physical presence. You must be rooted to have community; you must stay put for a period of time. Only then can you transform lives, and leave a mark.
The second consideration will be of Pinky & The Brain. Why is the brain so silly? He's a mouse who wants to conquer the world. We all begin wanting to be a firefighter, soldier, policeman, etc. Our desires are to be respected in the community. Then, out of nowhere adolescents hits and we think, "dear god, I have to lead a revolution, rule the world, be famous, date the prettiest girl in school! And all this must be done before I'm 20." Our desires outstrip reality, for the most part. But amazingly, we never recenter ourselves but buy into the belief that we must get out "experience" the world and be as successful as possible. It takes a quiet strength, which is humility, to commit to something worthwhile. I wish you luck and will be praying that you both enjoy your time and affect real growth.
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